feywood: Tony Stark looks lost ((Tony) lost boy)
I'm aliiiiive
Depression is a cruel mistress so I've spent a lot of time eating tinned and microwaved meals, but I'm back and at it again.

I realise kidney isn't for everyone, but what you need to know is you're wrong and it's delicious.

kidney and mushrooms in red wine sauce )
feywood: Angel Coulby made a whoopsy ((Angel) whoops)
Ahaha hello I am still alive. :)

No pictures about this one as I only realised "omg I should post this" as I was eating.

So let's make this quick and dirty.

Ingredients:
Whole grain pasta
mushrooms
wild asparagus (could also be spinach)
(light) cream cheese
your choice of protein. I went with the tiniest steak you've ever seen, but this could be chicken, shrimp, tofu...

Need:
Two pans
One pot.

To do:
Fill pot with water and season (olive oil and salt). Put on stove to boil. When boiling, add pasta, set timer for 1-2 minutes less than al dente.
Chop mushrooms.
Heat up pan with about two tablespoons of olive oil. Chuck in asparagus, then mushrooms (or mushrooms, then spinach). Season with salt and pepper.
In second pan, deal with your protein. Undercook it slightly.
When pasta is done, drain but reserve some of the water.
Add pasta to vegetables.
Make sure protein is bitesize (I sliced my steak afterward, but chicken or tofu could be done beforehand) and add to pan.
Add a heaped tablespoon of cream cheese (I used light philadelphia with fine herbs and garlic) and the half a cup of reserved water. Let it cook down till desired creaminess.
Done.

This took me all of twenty minutes to shove together when I realised I'd forgotten to eat, so it's definitely easy-peasy!
feywood: Dean Winchester with a mouth full of food ((Dean) food!)
I have the blahs and work was stressful and busy today (but not bad, really) and all the things and ugh depression and ugh everything else.

So have a music meme, this is amazing.

Playlist of the apocalypse

The first song is the overall theme for the Apocalypse:
Dragonforce - Valley Of The Damned.
Well. Appropriate much?

The second song is what plays when you kill your first zombie:
John Williams - A Dream Discarded (Memoirs of a Geisha OST)
Not very murdery-mayhem music, but the title works?

The third song plays when getting chased by a horde:
Creedence Clearwater Revival - Commotion
brb lolling

The fourth song plays when you have to kill your loved one:
Voltaire - Reggae Mortis
I love my ipod. no seriously, look this song up it is amazing. Voltaire is wonderful.

The fifth song plays when you find a group of survivors:
The Cranberries - Zombie
Ah. Well. Yes?

The sixth song plays when you meet a new love interest:
Paul and Storm - Your Love Is
Bwahahaha evil love interest is amazing love interest.

The seventh song plays when you have to make a final stand:
Enrique Iglesias - I Will Survive
Do not ask me why I have this.

The eight song plays when you think you've survived it all:
Disney's Pocahontas - Just Around The Riverbend
I actually watched this earlier! For the first time ever!

The ninth song plays when you discover a bite mark on you:
Edith Piaf - Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien
Also my ringtone. Unless it's family. Then it's grunty Swedish.

The tenth song plays over the end credits:
The Postal Service - Sleeping In
Not a bad choice. Not at all.


Back to the blahs for me now. Perhaps bed. I'm on call tomorrow. Fun times. If they call me before noon, heads will roll (and mine will explode).
feywood: Merlin in the woods (Default)
Title: Strawberry lemonade
Cuisine: who knows
Skill level: easy (not for children)
Time: 20 minutes
Portions: As many as you like

So I drink enormous amounts of lemonade )
feywood: Arthur Pendragon laughing ((Arthur) laughing)
Today is [personal profile] shanaqui and my seventh anniversary.
It's not one of the big numbers, but I feel it still deserves some attention.

We're both hopeless about remember anniversaries, really. We tend to forget till just the day before or, in one case, had to be reminded by [livejournal.com profile] iltaru

We met online eight years ago, roleplaying with a mutual friend.
Seven years ago, our first real life visit. One week spent together, crammed together in a tiny bedroom, being silly, laughing our asses off, working up the courage to kiss the other but both of us too scared to say anything.
But it happened and though we decided afterward that we wouldn't follow it up since it'd be too complicated, it didn't really last that long before we changed our minds and I haven't regretted that for one moment.

It hasn't always been easy.
There's still the distance between us. We don't see each other nearly often enough. We both have our issues, both mental and physical. There's stress, there's other people, there's families...
But at the same time, it's been so very, very good.
There isn't anyone in this world who knows me as well as Nikki does. There is no one in this world who has been kinder to me or who has shown me such endless patience and understanding. Who accepts my flaws, my mistakes and who appreciates me for who I am.

You will never know a better person than Nikki. Open mind, open heart and so very out of my league. There are still days I don't understand just why I'm so lucky, but I am always grateful that I kissed her, that very early morning on August 5th.
feywood: Arthur Pendragon laughing ((Arthur) laughing)
I am supposed to be getting ready for bed and my back is killing me, but this is what I'm up to right now.



Whoooooo
feywood: Merlin in the woods (Default)
Okay so it's really hard to get any cooking done while I'm in the 2PM - 10PM shift so here's a quick and dirty post.

Title: Summer lunch: insalata caprese
Cuisine: Italian
Skill level: easy peasy
Time: 5 minutes
Portions: 1 (very easily adaptable)

I wasn't kidding when I said quick )
feywood: Merlin in the woods (Default)
Here be the list of posts I have made/planned.

I have divided these into different genres to make any titles less vague (links go to tags):
Dinner for one: whatever I make, mostly tutorial style posts
Sweet tooth: baking, also mostly tutorial style
Home cooking: storytime! Mostly about my family and food

100 )
feywood: Mary Watson ((Mary) Mary Watson)
Title: Boyfriend pasta
Cuisine: who knows
Skill level: easy
Time: 40 minutes - 1 hour
Portions: 3 (very easily adaptable)

So the reason it's called boyfriend pasta... )
feywood: Sam Winchester laughing ((Sam) laugh)
Aaand the kick-off.

Recipe time!

Title: cabbage and mince (& mash potatoes)
Cuisine: comfort food
Skill level: easy peasy
Time: 35 minutes
Portions: 2-3

This way, please )
feywood: Merlin in the woods (Default)
I don't post a lot, we all know it. I think half my posts are dedicated to mentioning that I don't post a lot.
So I'll change that.

Basically what's going to happen is I'm going to try write 100 posts about a certain topic I love. They won't all be the same, there will be pictures and things and while I know I won't post every day, it should at least make me post more regularly and, hopefully, more interestingly.

The topic?
Food!

I love cooking, I love eating, I love thinking about and contemplating food. I like making shopping lists and I love doing groceries (if there just weren't as many other people in the store at the same time).
So it'll be all about me cooking, shopping, telling you all about the tasty thing I had/saw/smelled, etc. I have all the opinions.

You are, of course, all welcome to comment, reply, tell me off or share your own views and stories. I'd actually be super happy if you did, but don't see this in any way as an obligation.

Food is love.
feywood: Arthur Pendragon laughing ((Arthur) laughing)
I have been considering this for a while and I think I'll go through with it.




{Take the 100 Things challenge!}


More info and details when I'm not about to go to bed. :)
feywood: Mary Watson ((Mary) Mary Watson)
Let us bulletpoint!


  • Work: still probationing for senior position, etc, etc, all still good

  • The wedding is off. Not because we split up but because of bureaucracy nightmares. It's okay

  • I've taken up embroidery. It's fun. Slightly maddening. Good times

  • Was on citalopram, then came off it. It did nothing for my depression and killed my libido. Feeling good right now anyway so it's all fine

  • Currently off sick for a couple days on account of bad back pain. Doctor said possible slipped disc. Not sure. There might be physical therapy in my future

  • I'm watching Dark Angel. Basically I sit here salivating over Michael Weatherly and ickle Jensen Ackles

  • I totally unfucked my flat. Mostly because my landlord would be coming over, but it's as good a reason as any. I think it's part of the reason I feel okay right now

  • Have discovered [tumblr.com profile] unfuckyourhabitat. It's awesome

  • I'm still not getting a tumblr

Oh boy

Feb. 18th, 2012 11:07 pm
feywood: Merlin in the woods ((Merlin) magic)
Apparently it takes me being more than a bit tipsy to get me to post, soooo here we go.

Had dinner out with my family today. Parents, brother, his girlfriend.
Topic to avoid: brother's lost his job (didn't find this out till I was walking back to the train station with the parents). It's really too bad, he liked his job. It was probably because he'd been sick two weeks in two months, which really isn't his habit, but they apparently didn't realise that.
Anyway, the dinner was so lovely. There was a lot of alcohol, which explains my current state. But oh god the food. North sea shrimp with potato crisp, potato puree, buttermilk foam and cherry beer sauce. Veal sweetbreads with fennel in a duvel (beer) sauce, spring lamb with celery in a different beer sauce and a chocolate and cherry candies dessert. With wine. Lots of wine. Also cava. Such nice wine.
My tummy is the happiest right now.

Jobwise all is going well. Promotion is in sight and I'm in a probation period right now (till July). Lots of work, but I enjoy because it's not just taking calls like I've been doing for the past years. There's translation work, stuff that challenges my technical side, I get to send team-wide mails to remind them of procedures, I get to train new people... It all shows they trust me and have confidence in me, which is amazing and is doing me a world of good. I love it, really.

On the other hand, the question remains of how long I'll still be there. I'm really pushing myself (past depression, past listlessness, past whatnot) into getting my driving license and once I have this, I really need to, want to start looking for jobs in/near Cardiff. I want to move. I need to move.
In that same light, Nikki and I are getting married soon. Soon being a relative term, but... We are, if everything goes according to plan, going to request to register when I'm there in March and then actually get married in August. There are no words to describe how excited I am. We've been together for 7.5 years, I love her more than anything. It's time. This is, above anything else, what I want to do.
We're probably not going to invite many people, if any at all. We both see getting married (well, civil partnered, thank you UK) as an intensely private thing and we're going to treat it as such. We can't realistically afford a big party anyway.

This is my life, it is awesome. Except for the depression, but that'll go away.
feywood: Dean Winchester with a mouth full of food ((Dean) food!)
I'm spending a long weekend at my parents (and typing this on their qwerty keyboarded laptop, so typing is frustrating and slow) and it feels very odd. On the one hand, it definitely isn't like when I lived here and I'm not expected to do chores, on the other hand, I feel much more willing to do them (even the ones I don't do at home).
Most peculiar.

Spent Christmas eve here with parents, brother and his girlfriend. Foie gras, fondue and pictionary. And a massive amount of sex and cock jokes. Oh my. Also a lot of wine, this may have had something to do with it.
My brother turned out to know me quite well, present wise. He got me all of little britain and a book of cute amigurumi patterns. It's so fucking adorable. Then again, I did score massive points by getting him the magnetic thinking putty. I don't think he's let go of it yet. Don't know if I'm ever going to top that.

Christmas was... difficult. Large family party at my uncle's, too many people. My social battery was drained in a good two hours. I tried to keep it nice and polite and didn't resort to whining at mum about going home, but it was all I could do not to be running away from the table all the time to go and hide.
On the other hand, the food was amazing. Om nom nom bambi.

And now I've slept a lovely sleep, mum's off to work and dad has made croissants from scratch. Then lunch with leftovers (smoked eel on red beet/apple puree! raw tuna with raw courgette and ginger mayonaise! parsnip soup!) and then I go home again for a few more days off to very quietly celebrate my birthday. Good times.
feywood: Merlin in the woods ((Marvin) So depressed)
Just a quick meme because it entertained me and I'm trying to stave off a whiny "wah wah my life sucks" mood.

Your job is now your Time Lord name. The last digit of your phone number is the current regeneration you are in. The nearest clothing item to your right is now the most notable item in your current wardrobe. The last person you texted is your current companion. Your favorite word is now your catchphrase.

Name: The Helpdesk
Regeneration: 4th.
Notable clothing: A teal slightly frilly tunic (how fearsome will I be, oh my)
Companion: [personal profile] shanaqui (bestest companion, yes)
Catchphrase: Defenestrate

Ooh la la

Nov. 14th, 2011 10:16 pm
feywood: Merlin in the woods (Default)
I am horrifically bored and I need a break from sewing bits of knit dinosaur toys together so voila, I post.

Life is good for now and for a few more hours. Coming off a lovely four day weekend, though tomorrow I'm back in the thick of it.
Then again, last week was almost unnaturally quiet at work. After the months of heavy lifting we've had to do, we weren't even quite sure what to do with the free time between calls. And hey, my working so damn hard has finally paid off since the planning service was going to refuse me getting today off, but our darling team leader (who has the final word anyhow) overruled them and said I deserved it as a thank you for all my hard work.
And they're taking us all out to an all expenses paid dinner sometime in december. So whoo.

Other than that, very little to say. My zombie costume at the con was a success, I had tons of fun and got a compliment from Dina Meyer, which still ranks pretty high. Some people wanted to take my picture, too, so I think it was overall pretty good.
The final result )

And, since it's been forever, have a meme:

You can learn a lot about someone by the music they listen to. Hit shuffle on your iPod or mp3 player and write down the first 20 songs. No cheating or skipping songs that are shameful. That is the fun!

1. Rammstein - Mutter
2. Major Parkinson - Bazooka Mirror
3. Led Zeppelin - Kashmir
4. Volbeat - The Human Instrument
5. Seth Lakeman - Poor Man's Heaven
6. Soulfly - Babylon
7. Muse - Starlight
8. The Prodigy - Breathe
9. John Williams - Destiny's Path
10. Creedence Clearwater Revival - Who'll Stop The Rain
11. Heather Dale - Flowers of Bermuda
12. The Offspring - Nothingtown
13. Dar Williams - Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere
14. Finntroll - Ett Norrskendåd
15. Dragonforce - Heroes Of Our Time
16. Metallica - Orion
17. Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah
18. Vienna Teng - Momentum
19. Tegan & Sara - Proud
20. Voltaire - Wall Of Pride

I find it entertaining to see the very obvious influence of [personal profile] shanaqui in that list.
feywood: Merlin in the woods ((Marvin) So depressed)
I had a day off today and I so don't want to go back to work tomorrow.

It's been madness for weeks, for months and while relief is in sight (toward the end of this month or mid-november), the extra effort we've been having to put in goes unrewarded.
Many people have also been finding creative ways of skiving which are noticed, but go unpunished, meaning that those of us who play fair? We get even more work.
I took 92 calls on Monday, for fuck's sake. That's all day on the phone without break. Pick up, handle client, hang up, repeat. No room for two breaths between calls. You have your lunch break and twenty minutes to take as you want. That's it. Technically, that includes even going to pee. That's not a pace you can keep. I've lost track of how many times I've thought "I could really just cry right now".
And yes, yes, it'll get better. They keep telling us that. But in the mean time, we lost four good people at the end of last month (three transfers, one fired) and four more are leaving end of this month. They hired two new part timers, but they need to be trained, their average call number and call duration will be very low and high respectively for months to come...

They're now also giving out permanent contracts like they're candy.
You're there? Then you get one. It makes a farce out of the effort I had to put in to get that contract. You don't even have to be good at your job anymore. They're that afraid we'll leave. And the bonus I get for taking calls in French and English (on top of Dutch) does not make it worth it. €90 after taxes is not compensation for sometimes having up to double the amount of work. They've been saying for months that they're analysing that and they'll change that bonus system, but nothing is happening and nothing will happen for a very long time.

I did get the good news that in the coming restructuring, I'm getting the position I wanted (complex helpdesk rather than the new general banking dep. half of us are getting thrown into), but again, that's not happening for months and while it means they believe in me and my technical abilities, it doesn't help what's happening right now. It also doesn't mean a pay rise or anything. Shit, we even learned that while all the other departments are class C, the helpdesk is only B. We take more calls than any of them, our work is 'appreciated' and we're really fucking special, but we're a class below. It doesn't make much difference at this point since our (sub)company doesn't pay based on your class, but it makes a world of difference when you transfer to headquarters and you get bumped up a few classes, but not as many as someone from a different department. And headquarters does pay based on your classification.


But there are nice things.

I finished my zombie costume, which people on twitter have already seen, and I'm relatively pleased with it.
Cut for picture )

And I'm getting my tax return end of next month, so I'll finally be able to afford new desktop without having to dip into my savings. I thought for a long while about building my own like a proper geek, but I have neither the time nor the energy.


I'm just tired. And cranky. And trying really hard to keep my end of year bonus in mind.
feywood: Tony Stark looks lost ((Tony) lost boy)
Please, all of you, promise me something.

If ever you call a helpdesk and they tell you you made a mistake or the reason it's not working is because of something you did?
Don't automatically snap and yell that's impossible, you did everything correctly.

We see shit you don't. We see server logs, we know what the ongoing technical issues are and aren't. Most of the time we tell you "must have been a server hiccup", we're just placating you.

Yes, some helpdesks are incompetent assholes. It happens, but please, for the love of my sanity, don't just assume we must be lying. We don't mess up the system just to fuck with you. We don't care enough.
feywood: Tony Stark looks lost ((Tony) lost boy)
I am not usually involved in social justice cases.

I am, as with most everything on the internet and even in my offline activities, perfectly content to sit on the edges and watch people talk and be busy. I will, occasionally put in my two cents but mostly where no one can see this. Part of this is because engaging in these discussions takes a lot of energy which I just don’t have, the other part is because I have a hard time expressing myself in writing as well as the fact that I get shy. I convince myself no one cares what I think and then don’t voice it at all.
But that is a different matter, for a different post and not what I want to address right now.

Last night, I made the mistake of voicing an opinion.

And then there was drama )


Tl;dr? Matthew Inman is an asshole and the internet is mean.



As a last note, just in case: I am only voicing my opinion here. I do not claim to speak for any group and I do not claim any affiliation with any groups. I cannot even claim to speak for shanaqui here, for all that she did proof it. All I am is a queer person who was bothered by an offhand joke and who got bullied into silence. Or not so much.